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F i e r o J o e . c o m   P r e s e n t s
Are you double-clutching your titanium valve springs?
And other Go-Fast myths...

The Fast and the Furious
      Ah, an excellent choice. This is a classic movie for finding dumb car blunders in. As a matter of fact, this movie is so wonderful, that it won the illustrious FieroJoe.com Chock Full-'O-Crap award!
 kwgBnT1c7wFe By: ub5tKhQifJt
The Line Great arletci, thank you again for writing.
The Truth Great arletci, thank you again for writing.
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 M8hPhkSGI67 By: lnARiLnI
The Line If my problem was a Death Star, this article is a photon topdero. http://pahcatp.com [url=http://apboaebh.com]apboaebh[/url] [link=http://fqrzuthiev.com]fqrzuthiev[/link]
The Truth If my problem was a Death Star, this article is a photon topdero. http://pahcatp.com [url=http://apboaebh.com]apboaebh[/url] [link=http://fqrzuthiev.com]fqrzuthiev[/link]
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 An38oJtX By: TLuAR9fginmq
The Line A million thanks for posting this inotfmaoirn.
The Truth A million thanks for posting this inotfmaoirn.
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 nP30eJLdCBf By: PjySQBOO
The Line Please teach the rest of these internet hoanigols how to write and research!
The Truth Please teach the rest of these internet hoanigols how to write and research!
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 Ten Second Cars By: Unknown
The Line "You owe me a ten second car."
The Truth Did that first race seem like an awfully long 1/4 mile to you? I think it was around one minute or something. They blew it up faster than it blew itself up.
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 Gas for brains By: FieroJoe
The Line ...He's got Nitrous Oxide in his veins and Gasoline for brains...
The Truth     Ok, this was just plain cheezey. I will give him this... He is the only one that didn't say "Naus"!
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 A Racer's Stance By: FieroJoe
The Line ...It's not how you stand by your car, it's how you race your car. You better learn that.
The Truth In a street racer's world, I am glad to know that knowledge of this caliber is freely available. Without it, one may find themselves totally lost.
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 NOS (Pronounced "NAUS") By: FieroJoe
The Line Too many to count.
The Truth     NOS is an abbreviation for "Nitrous Oxide Systems", a Holley Company. I realize that "street" lingo out in California may be one thing, but that does not change the facts. With Nitrous Oxide being the product that it is, it comes under great public praise, and due to it's popularity it is moved out of the realms of common misnomers and into the major league misnomers such as the world renown "Cadillac Converter".

    That being said, I would like to bring your attention to the very nature of the word NOS. You will note that the word is an abbreviation, therefore it relinquishes all rights to be labeled as a "word". NOS is not a word. NOS was never a word. NOS will never be a word. NOS is an abbreviation. Not to mention, it sounds dumb. Did I mention that IT'S JUST A FRIGGING ABBREVIATION!

Abbreviation \Ab*bre`vi*a"tion\, n. [LL. abbreviatio: cf. F.abbr ['e]viation.]
1. The act of shortening, or reducing.
 
2. The result of abbreviating; an abridgment. --Tylor.
 
3. The form to which a word or phrase is reduced by contraction and omission; a letter or letters, standing for a word or phrase of which they are a part; as, Gen. for Genesis; U.S.A. for United States of America.

    In the American language, if we were to pronounce all abbreviations as words, it would be commonplace to call the company "Racer Components Incorporated", "Arceee", the company "Automotive Racing Products", "Arp" (pronounced just like the fish minus the 'c'), and you would call our great country "Ooosah". As you can plainly see, this approach does not work, nor does it work in the case of Nitrous Oxide Systems. There are more common "slang" terms for this setup that are not an advertisement for The Fast and the Furious or for Nitrous Oxide Systems. Common slang phrases are: Nitrous, Nitrous Oxide, NO2 or N.O.S. (please note the periods... For all of you rice boys who would pronounce that NAUS, those "periods" mean that you sound out each letter as if you were saying the alphabet). So, everyone take a deep breath and repeat after me:

        NOS ain't a word, and I ain't gonna say it.

There. Now don't you feel better?
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 Titanium Valve Springs By: FieroJoe
The Line Praying...thank you for providing us with the direct port nitrous injection, 4 core intercooler, ball bearing turbos, and um... titanium valve springs.
The Truth     Titanium does have uses in the valve train. It is VERY strong, and has been used for valve retainers and valve spring caps. However strong it is, it is also very brittle. Anyone who knows what a spring of ANY type does, should realize that the last quality you want in the spring is it being brittle. For those who don't understand why Titanium would NOT make a good spring, here is the definition of Brittle:

brittle (adj)   1: having little elasticity; hence easily cracked or fractured or snapped;

    As you can see, the very essence of a spring is it's ability to absorb and store potential energy. Springs can not be easily cracked, because the nature of a spring is very high levels of elasticity(springiness). So, you can plainly see, titanium will never make a valve spring.
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 Double Clutching By: FieroJoe
The Line ...You're granny shifting, not double clutching like you should...
The Truth     Double clutching is technique employed by truck drivers and manual transmission drivers who either have bad or no synchronizers. It is used to help bring the engine side of the manual transmission back up to speed before putting the transmission into a higher gear, to help keep from grinding gears. The process is as follows:

Single Clutching: Depress Clutch Pedal -> Switch Gear -> Release Clutch Pedal
Double Clutching: Depress Clutch Pedal -> Pull Transmission out of gear -> Release Clutch Pedal -> Depress Clutch Pedal -> Put into higher gear -> Release Clutch Pedal

    So what does this mean to a drag racer? Simple. In a real drag race, one key thing is the ability to shift well, and fast. So how does this have an effect on one's ability to shift well, you may ask. In plain and simple terms, for every one shift that your opponent is making, you are making two. You do the math.
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